Friday 30 December 2011

BIRD OF THE YEAR 2011

The Bird of the Year 2011 Award (posthumously) goes to Fluffy the Bird.

Fluffy was a complex bird. He was a brilliant bird. Like most geniuses, no one ever really understood him; he sometimes would not even understand himself.

Notable life achievements:
  • Heading a coup to overthrow the alpha male, which nearly worked.
  • Beating up other birds to impress and win over one Jameela the Bird, a highly desirable bird.
  • Trusting humans in front of other birds, making the other birds more trustworthy of humans.
Fluffy would always do his best to help other birds. He would not always be appreciated, but he never needed anyone’s appreciation, it just made him happy to feel like he was contributing. Maybe we could all learn something from Fluffy.

Fluffy the Bird: 2008 – August 2011.
 
 

 

Wednesday 28 December 2011

Fashion, Muslims and Irony

AS PUBLISHED IN KALIMAT MAGAZINE ISSUE 02, SUMMER 2011 www.kalimatmagazine.com

The word  "fashion" usually conjures up images of  almost-naked women parading down catwalks, indulgent after-parties for the beautiful and elite, and covergirl  images so heavily Photoshopped even Hosni Mubarak’s plastic face looks more plausible.
It’s why you’re likely to get the “haraam finger” pointed at you when you talk about fashion in a “Muslim” context. The expression “Muslim fashion” seems to be as ironic as Lady Gaga calling herself a lady.
We generally accept fashion to be defined as a celebration of sexuality; the objectification of a woman; her empowerment through her 6 inch stilettos. But isn’t fashion just another word for “clothes”, and doesn’t everyone need to wear clothes? Yet, despite the rather simple definition of the latter, it is the more widely accepted former definition which informs the idea that Islam is at odds with “fashion”. As a consequence, Muslims who show an interest in fashion are deemed as unholy women, shallow and wasting their time with such pointless things. Rather than designers focusing on the challenging task of designing clothing which tick all the modesty boxes, whilst remaining relevant to the societies they live in, they’re too busy halal-ifying the very idea of modest fashion to the critics. Rather than trying to find solutions which allow Muslim women to have the same life choices available to them as they would do if they didn’t wear hijab, they’re too busy getting the approach to  modest fashion wrong. The confusion is threefold:

1) The “Sheek Awee” method.
Take one plain, modest outfit. Make the outfit appealing by modelling it in a sexual manner. Complete the look by wearing so much makeup it looks like you’re sponsored by Maybelline. 

2) The “Mu7tarram” method.
Take one plain black abaya. Get some nice plastic crystals and stick them to the abaya in a nice heart shape arrangement. Also, celebrate your Muslim identity by writing the word “Allah” in said crystals.

3) The “Filous kiteer” method.
Take one Emirati who condemns the hedonistic-bikini-wearing infidel to hell. Take the same Emirati who wears the Calvin Klein hijab –a brand which uses said hedonistic infidel to promote and represent their products. Forget about the irony of a luxury brand being used as a symbol for an anti-materialistic Islam: focus on the initial problem.

So what IS good “Muslim fashion” design? Maybe the operative word should be “design”. Maybe we start with a specification that defines what the product needs to do. Maybe the product prioritises empowerment and not how pretty a hijab can be made to look.  Maybe the product reflects the sentiment of liberation of being a Muslim woman. Maybe we reclaim the word “fashion” and coin it by our own definition.

Thursday 22 December 2011

THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING SELF-IMPORTANT

Forget progressive ideas, forward thinking design and hilarious yet thought-provoking social commentary, I’ve finally done what I should have been doing for ages to be a successful fashion blogger –post pictures of myself for mass adoration purely based on my looks and ability to strike poses which don’t really make any sense. Here I am wearing some new laser cut jewellery coming soon to elenany.co.uk. Of course the important bit is me and not the product –it’s a lot simpler to understand that way.




Stay tuned for more info (pictures that include me probably), of what I think is hot right now, seeing as I obviously know and obviously intelligent people care.